It can be disheartening to see your child lose interest in something you hoped would bring them joy.
Maybe they used to run to the piano… and now they need constant reminders.
Maybe you’ve said things like:
“You used to love playing — what happened?”
“Why don’t you just practise for ten minutes?”
“Don’t you realise how lucky you are to have lessons?”
If this sounds familiar, please know — you’re not alone. Nearly every music parent experiences this at some point.
The good news? Motivation can be rebuilt. And no, it doesn’t have to involve bribing or nagging.
Let’s explore what’s really going on — and what can help.
Motivation Doesn’t Start with Action
As parents, we often jump to the final step: “Just practise!” But motivation doesn’t begin there. Instead, think of motivation as a process — a gentle build-up that leads to action.
I like to use this simple acronym: A.I.D.A.
A = Attention
I = Interest
D = Desire
A = Action
Let’s unpack each one.
A = Attention
This is the first and easiest step.
Before a child can be interested, they need their attention gently drawn to the piano. But timing is everything.
If your child is in the middle of a game or watching something, and you suddenly say, “Go and practise now,” it may feel like you’re dragging them away from something they enjoy.
Try This:
Set a regular practice time that fits your family rhythm. For example:
10 minutes before breakfast
A short session after school snack time
This way, practice time is expected — not a surprise interruption.
And here’s the trick: At this stage, your job is just to call their attention.
No pressure. No judgment. No reminders about how little they’ve practised lately. Just… attention.
I = Interest
Once your child is at the piano, interest is what keeps them there.
We all tend to keep doing things we find enjoyable or satisfying — children are no different.
Try This:
Avoid correcting every mistake
Comment positively:
“That piece sounds cheerful!”
“I like that rhythm — it’s catchy!”
You don’t need to give a detailed assessment — just give them a good feeling about being at the piano.
D = Desire
This is where motivation really begins to bloom. Desire means your child wants to play — not because they were told to, but because something in them says, “I want to try that again.”
If motivation has dipped for a while, this may take some time. Be patient. Your quiet encouragement is the water and sunshine that helps it grow.
Try This:
Ask your child:
“What would make you want to play more?”
“Would you like to collect stickers or points when you practise?”
You might be surprised by how simple their answers are. Many children enjoy stickers or small tokens — not for material rewards, but for a sense of progress and recognition. (Let’s be honest — adults like collecting airmiles or supermarket points too!)
A = Action
This is the step every parent hopes for — but it’s the last step in the process.
Here’s the key: if Attention, Interest, and Desire are in place, Action will come naturally.
What Not to Do
It’s tempting to push harder when motivation dips — but often, that backfires.
Instead, try not to:
Criticise their effort (“You’ve done enough!”)
Compare them to others (“Your sister used to practise without being asked…”)
Threaten to cancel lessons (this can add shame instead of clarity)
Instead, focus on what you can influence: the environment, the routine, the atmosphere.
Let’s Work as a Team
Your child’s teacher isn’t just here to correct notes and assign scales — they’re here to support your child’s growth and help you understand how that growth unfolds. When parents, students, and teachers come together as a team, something truly special happens: we create a shared environment where learning is joyful, not pressured.
But here’s where things often go wrong…
The biggest cause of frustration for parents, students, and even teachers is this:
Everyone is looking for visible results too soon — and too often.
Motivation dips when progress is constantly measured, analysed, or questioned. Children can start to feel like they’re being tested every time they sit at the piano. It’s a lot to carry — and not very encouraging.
Imagine this scenario:
Your child sits down to practise, and after five minutes, they hear:
“Is that all?”
“You need to practise more.”
“I can’t hear any progress.”
Even if well-meant, these comments create a sense of pressure and disappointment. Instead of building motivation, they plant seeds of doubt. And over time, these seeds can grow into reluctance — or even resentment.
Shift the Focus from Progress to Enjoyment
What if we shifted the focus from “How well are they doing?” to “How much are they enjoying this right now?”
Because motivation doesn’t come from being constantly measured.
It comes from feeling successful, seen, and supported.
Try This Instead:
Ask your child:
“What kind of tunes do you enjoy most?”
“Would you like to finish your practice by playing one of your own pieces?”
“What was your favourite part of your last lesson?”
These simple questions create space for pleasure, choice, and connection — and these are the building blocks of sustainable motivation.
Create Space for Reflection — Not Constant Evaluation
Instead of trying to assess progress daily or weekly, I recommend a semi-formal review every few months or at the end of each term. This takes just ten minutes and can involve:
The student, reflecting on what they’ve enjoyed or struggled with
The teacher, offering insight and gentle feedback
The parents, sharing their hopes or questions
This is far more productive — and far kinder — than daily critiques. It also models an important life lesson: progress takes time, and reflection is something we do together, not in isolation.
Clarify Your Goals Together
To work well as a team, it helps to have shared goals. Ask yourself:
“What do I really want for my child through music?”
It might be:
“I want my child to enjoy the piano and feel proud of themselves.”
“I’d like them to work towards grades in the future.”
“I want clear practice tips so I can support them better at home.”
Whatever your hopes are, let your teacher know. The more clearly you can communicate, the more tailored and helpful your child’s lessons will be.
Teachers, too, need to be clear about what they are aiming for — whether it’s building technical fluency, developing musical expression, or simply nurturing confidence. A mismatch in expectations can lead to demotivation or confusion for everyone.
So don’t be afraid to ask:
“What’s the focus right now?”
“What can I support at home?”
“How do you think my child is progressing?”
And just as importantly — tell us what’s going well, too!
Final Thought
Final Thoughts
The best kind of progress is the one that happens together, in a calm and trusting environment.
You’re not just supporting your child’s music education — you’re helping them build confidence, creativity, and resilience.
With kindness, clarity, and teamwork, motivation becomes something that lasts — and music becomes something your child will carry with them for life.
Motivation isn’t magic — it’s momentum.
Start with small, positive steps. Create space for attention. Keep the environment kind. Allow interest to grow.
And remember: you’re not failing. You’re parenting — and you’re doing it with care.
Want Help with Practice Routines?
Want Help with Practice Routines?
If you’d like more tips on how to increase motivation and encouragement — whether you’re a parent or a music tutor — here are some ways to stay connected:
🔗 Follow my Facebook page for regular encouragement, resources and insights for music teachers and families.
🎹 Book a one-off consultation session if you’re a parent who wants advice on how to keep your child motivated with their music learning. I’d love to support you.
🎵 Are you a tutor? If you’re finding that your students — or their parents — are losing motivation or not making the progress you expected, you’re also very welcome to book a consultation. Sometimes just one fresh perspective can make all the difference. You can use this session to ‘pick my brain’! Book your session here.
I look forward to helping you build a more compassionate, motivating music journey — one lesson at a time.